You Can’t Fix What You Don’t Acknowledge

Let’s raise awareness and empower the victims of abuse. Please read and share the following poem, written by the sister of a fellow blogger. A link to his blog follows the poem below. Show some love and support y’all!


Battered Wife Syndrome

Does anyone really begin to know what women go through day after day?

It’s like some women have no say.

Put the men out on the street, so they would know what it feels like to get beat

How many times did I end up on the floor?

Because how many times I couldn’t get out the door

Do this. Do that. Do this. Do that.

The psychiatrist said he would not to live like that.

When you stay in violence this is what goes on

But somehow I think somebody knew

’cause God sees everything  you go through.

What I had to go through day after day was not right.

How many times did I shake with fright?

Just to be able to sit outside

I used to take rides on my bike to calm myself down,

so I wouldn’t end up with a nervous breakdown.

Women unite.

Take back the night.

When we talk about respect, respect works both ways.

Again, listen to what I say

From broken glass to a broken door

Boy, was I sore!

No woman likes to be a battered wife.

Yes, there were times I cried.

Yes, there are times I wanted to die

Oh, if you only knew what I was going through!

No woman needs to get beat ’til they’re black and blue

This in turn can happen to you.

How many times did I take a fall?Boundaries poster

How many times did I get my head banged against a wall?

Was it the whisky or was it the beer?

Why was I going through this year after year?

Women of the world unite.

Let’s remember take back the night.

Let’s also take to the streets to spread the message that no woman needs to get beat.

Is that any kind of life?

–Judith Frotten


From a blogger in Canada truly making a difference!


A Splash of Love....

Disclaimer: I have received permission to write about the details shared in this post.


One evening this week I witnessed one of the most powerful things I’ve seen in my life. To protect the individuals, I will be skimpy on details….

It all started several weeks ago, when I met a young woman through a mutual friend, whom I vaguely remember ‘meeting’ many years ago. Because of our age difference, she was ‘but a child’ and I was an adult, so there was no interaction, that I recall.

We met at a restaurant for dinner, as perfect strangers, and spent almost six hours talking, listening, and exploring her story. As she shared, raw pain spilled out, and, with it, the guilt over having suffered less than others in her life, and yet suffering deep trauma. She felt lost and alone.  Abandoned and rejected. Always had.

The three most traumatic…

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When Getting Back Control Of Your Life Means Letting Go


Scared child

Scared child (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Anyone who has suffered from the trauma of abuse of any kind knows that one of the scariest feelings is that of having no control. Feelings of grief, sadness, and loss are common. With help and time those feelings tend become easier to resolve internally than the feeling of fear. Fear is debilitating. Fear is paralyzing.  And with abuse, fear comes in many forms.


Adult survivors of abuse commonly report one of their biggest fears as losing control of their lives. This is so common because of the survivor‘s primed physiology. When an individual is physically threatened…..or perceives that they are….. the body’s complex biology kicks into gear releasing hormones and other chemicals which we typically refer to as the fight or flight syndrome. A component of that syndrome with particularly negative consequences is that of repetitive thought. Put simply, your brain lays down a specific neuronal connection associated with the event that is easily activated over and over again. Many survivors feel like they are “losing their minds”, an expression of this repetitive thought process over which they feel they have no conscious control. Out of desperation, trying to silence these thoughts, many survivors turn to mind numbing substances both legal and illegal. Sadly, this typically creates more problems than it solves in the long run, even if the survivor achieves a measure of temporary relief.


So as a survivor, or a member of that person’s support system, how can one take back that sense of control? How can you stop the cycle of unhealthy repetitive thought? Is there a way to reclaim some measure of control without creating additional havoc? In my experience, there absolutely is a way.  Nobody is going to tell you this will be easy or without some pain, but the payoff is worth it. And believe it or not, one of the first steps is to learn to let go.


As a survivor of abuse, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to take inventory of the people in your life. It’s proven through many studies that like attracts like, so if you find yourself surrounded by people with negative energy, your thoughts are then pulled into negativity. Identifying the people in your life that are not positive and supportive, then taking the necessary steps to let these people go, will be one of the best steps you can take towards living your best life. Another critical step is to reach out for help. Not one of us lives in a vacuum, even if we wish we did, and finding someone you can talk to without fear of judgement or criticism is vital.


There are many new fields of trauma therapy available that help you regain control and release your fears. These include techniques such as energy psychology, visualization, meditation, mindfulness, and self-hypnosis. Research the different forms of therapy available to you and find the one that fits best.  With time and support, you will find a way to let go of those negative thoughts and move on. Keep on going forward, you are worth it and you matter the most.





You Matter

You Matter (Photo credit: Krissy.Venosdale)